Friday, December 19, 2008

A Beautiful Gift Denied.

Last Tuesday at work a friend told me that God was going to make me miserable until I gave Him everything He wanted from me. My friend was right. I rejoice in the Lord and am grateful for all the blessings He has chosen to give me, but I feel a dull pain in my soul. You see, later on Tuesday evening after the conversation I had with my friend, I was wondering more about what God was wanting from me and thinking to myself, "If I could just have some sort of confirmation." Then God spoke to me so clearly, "If you want confirmation, I will give it to you." I shut down. I shut him out. I was scared. A beautiful gift denied. Here I was, God himself offering me guidance, and I forced myself to draw away from Him. I have treated my Heavenly Father like the wind, attempting to keep Him at bay and moderate Him for my comfort by opening and closing a window. I feel . . . well, miserable. Just as my friend said I would. But I find comfort knowing that my disobedience will not forever divide me from my savior.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38,39)

2 comments:

Marggy Hensley said...

The cost of following Christ is High: Luke 14:25-34
The Cost of Being a Disciple
25Large crowds were traveling with Jesus, and turning to them he said: 26"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.
28"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? 29For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, 30saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.'

31"Or suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Will he not first sit down and consider whether he is able with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? 32If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. 33In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple.

34"Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? 35It is fit neither for the soil nor for the manure pile; it is thrown out.
"He who has ears to hear, let him hear."

But oh so worth it...

Nathan said...

thanks Marggy . . .