Friday, July 9, 2010

Seek, Serve, Fear, Look

Even before I really began developing an understanding about what it meant to have a relationship with Christ, or what it means to serve Him, I felt Him pulling me.
Guiding me in certain directions.
Calling me to things that seemed impossible.

In my frailty,  I've chosen to serve fear in life more than God.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of inadequacy and failure.

Doors have since closed. Perhaps forever.
But the Lord is merciful and offers chance after chance.
New doors open daily.

I wish I could boldly declare that fear no longer has a hold on me, but I know I couldn't do this with complete confidence. But even so, I look at where I'm at, where God has led me.
The risks we face.
The uncertainty.

And I feel a great hope well up inside me. Faith has brought us here. God will see us through, and its the faith He nurtures within me that also brings strength and courage.
He is the mighty provider.
The vine that is my source of all.

I've realized, upon looking back, that when I'm in a place where I must choose between my Father or my fear, I look for reassurance to aide in the decision; the right words from the right people. But this is based on my own determination, not the Lord's. In looking for what I want to see, I miss what He is showing me.
The words He wants me to hear.
From the source that He chooses.

The journey never fails to provide new challenges, placing goals ahead of me to strive towards.
Seek God above all else.
Serve Him obediently.
Fear Him alone.
Look through the spiritual eyes He's given me.

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