Friday, February 8, 2013

busted

Not exactly having the best week... 

I haven't slept in over 36 hours, and to top things off, I accidentally busted our bedroom window this morning. 

But the good news is, our rental management is going to replace the glass at no-charge. 

The bad news is, they're coming to fix it when I get home from work in the morning, prolonging, yet again, my much needed sleep. 

Lots of work to do for school, but I'm feeling too loopy from being tired to really focus. 

And I haven't just blown my diet healthy lifestyle, I've totally busted that, too. Obliterated by bingeing on brown sugar rolled up into warm tortillas and peanut butter pretzels. Random, I know.

My left eye has been twitching, an annoying symptom of when I'm overstressed, and those pity-poor-me thoughts of worthlessness have been trying to creep up on me. 

I think a lot of these emotions have been triggered by the abundance of schoolwork I have ahead of me... and behind me, as I've fallen a bit behind and can't seem to catch up. I spend more time and energy stressing about assignments than actually completing them. My 4.0 GPA? Pretty sure that's going to get busted this semester.

So far, I've had two practicum interviews and both went well. There is one site in particular I'm hoping to get, and I'm feeling pretty confident that the spot is mine, but all the waiting and unknown is killing me. Whatever site I get will greatly influence my life over the next year (schedule, etc.), and I can't start preparing myself for those changes until I know what they're going to be.

My window is busted. My weight loss. My GPA. Me. My patience. My heart. My mind. Busted

Just a little busted, I know. I know it's all repairable and it's going to get better soon. Except for the window. That needs replaced. But everything else is temporarily. God is good and mends all things

But right now I'm looking through a busted window. And it's hard to see past the cracks.

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