I did it.
I hit the "send" button.
And I mean business.
I just emailed HR a two-week notice of resignation from my full-time position at work, and dropped a handwritten notice in the interoffice mail.
I've been burning my wick from both ends over the past several months and now practicum approaches, adding to the mix. After a lot of prayer (and, just to be very honest, a whole lot of freaking out), I've decided to step down from my full-time position and only work on an on-call basis until my schoolwork is complete sometime next summer or early fall.
A huge weight has been lifted knowing I won't be under the pressure of working quite as much while I finish these last few semesters of school and complete practicum. The thought of seeing my wife more than twice a week is kinda nice, too! Moving to overnight shifts was a necessary evil so I could take more classes, but it's an evil that I won't soon miss. Hence, I am joyful, for all these reasons and many more.
So why frightened? I was approved for a living-expense loan designed for grad students and Kimberly's business is thriving. And most of all, God is good. So there really isn't any good reason to be frightened. But the living expenses in SoCal are sky-high, and we're accustomed to being a two-income family. Adding to my student debt doesn't feel awesome either. It's all just a little scary. Yet alas, as I said, there's really no reason to be frightened.
More than anything, this is just another opportunity for us to grow in faith and dependence on God.
And, yes, I am just a little sad.
There's a kid here I'm going to miss.
But just one. And only a little.
Endings. Beginnings. Blah blah blah.
More than anything, I'm just ready to dive into practicum head first, I'm excited I might get to sleep in increments greater than four hours, and I'm pumped I may get to see my wife, friends, and family more often.
So... yeah. There's that.