Thursday, February 28, 2008

Relief

Notice the awesome hat this fellow is wearing. I wore one just like it all day. I believe it’s called a . . . not a fedora . . . Oh! It’s called a vise.

My vise is special though. It’s invisible. No one can see it, not even me, but I can definitely feel it. It also fluctuates in size, always fitting a little differently. Today, it was especially snug and became increasingly so.

It’s been a bit of a theme for me this week; constriction, pressure, headaches.

Fortunately, I was really able to just relax later this evening, and oddly enough, my vise just disappeared. Well, in theory it disappeared. It’s hard to really tell since it’s invisible and all.

I also was pleasantly surprised at the realization that tomorrow is Friday! I’m pretty sure that the dress code strictly prohibits vises on Fridays.

Lord, thank you for relief!!!

I should probably pass the memo on to the guy in the picture. He needs some relief too!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Tsunami

Check out this awesome picture of me! What? Can’t see me? Oh, that’s because I’m standing behind this huge pile of papers; my perpetual reminder that no matter how much I do, there is still much left to be done.

Look a little closer at this pile.

Resembles a wave, right? Continuously ebbing . . . washing out to nothingness . . . only to re-edify. I’ll spare you dramatics and leave out references to waves and paperwork being similar in their tendencies to come crashing down on people.

I have lovingly begun to refer to my own personal title wave of papers as Tsunami.

Tsunami and I are developing a good rapport with one another. We have lunch together. We spend many hours together.

Tsunami’s friendship is unconditional. I push Tsunami away, completely removing her from my life, but Tsunami always comes back. Always.

At least some things in life are predictable.

Thanks, Tsunami!

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Joy

1. Feelings of great happiness or pleasure, especially of an elevated or spiritual kind
2. A pleasurable aspect of something, or something that is seen as a source of happiness


So, for those of you who don’t know, my job can become quite . . . interesting at times. I manage a residential treatment program for sexually maladaptive youth. Yep, juvenile sex offenders. Normally, that’s all I have to say, and people are ready to talk about the weather.

It’s actually a great job to have though. I work with fantastic staff and really feel like I am working to benefit others. I really am blessed to be where I’m at in life and feel like God is using me to make a difference. But providing treatment, creating a non-threatening yet secure environment, and protecting the community simultaneously is strenuous at times.

Today just happened to be one of those days where it all just caught up with me. It would be inappropriate, and disturbing to most readers, to go into detail, but the events and issues of the past couple weeks have been a little overwhelming. Sitting in a meeting and speaking casually about some recent situations, I suddenly had an epiphany, “Holy crap!” I thought, “This sucks!” For about two minutes I felt completely defeated.

Then, I laughed. I couldn’t help but do anything else! I laughed when I was notified of a new concern, and I laughed when checking my mail to receive an unpleasant letter. I laughed when I realized someone I had been helping all day just lied to me, and I laughed when leaving the office, knowing I was leaving so much unfinished.

These were all inappropriate times to laugh. Yes. Be assured, I’m not crazy. I understand this. I understand that laughter would usually indicate some degree of joy. But that’s the thing. At that point of misery, I still had a sense of joy, confirming that despite the obstacles I may face or the frustration I may feel, I am right where God wants me to be.